We all go through this… And if I am honest, I never quite understood why I turned to martial arts, my music and fitness (another expression of my Kung Fu) when I felt something “uncommon”. Anxiety & Depression can feel like a heavy weight—one that slows you down or worries you immensely, dims your passion, and makes even the smallest tasks feel overwhelming. Just like me, many people turn to Kung Fu or other physical disciplines as a way to break free from this darkness. And at first, it works.
The movements awaken the body. The focus quiets the mind. The structure brings a sense of control. For a while, at least there is hope.
But then something happens. Just like Bong Sau / Tan Sau, that follow the Maxim “When the tail of the dragon sinks the head rises, when the head of the dragon sinks the tail rises” Same thing happens with my emotions. Sometimes I can be with my head up… sometimes the excitement fades. The once-powerful motivation begins to weaken. The same practice that sometimes feel like an escape it can also feel like routine. Sometimes I feel like pushing through, sometimes I feel like drifting away. Why?
My answer was one thing…. purpose. If I see Kung Fu only as a personal journey—something to “fix” myself— I will often struggle when as that excitement fades. But as I shifted my perspective—and started using training not just for myself, but to help others—I find something deeper, something that keeps me going even when motivation is low.
The Trap of Seeking Only Personal Healing
When I started training, I was often fueled by an internal need:
• “I want to feel stronger.”
• “I want to stop feeling stuck.”
• “I need something to pull me out of this.”
And in the beginning, it worked. The structure, the physical movement, the small victories—they brought relief. But if my only goal is personal healing, what happens when the progress slows?
When Kung Fu is only about how I feel, it becomes easy to stop when it no longer feels “new” or exciting. But healing isn’t just about feeling better—it’s about finding a reason to keep going, even on the hard days.
How Service Transformed my Journey
In this long road, I noticed, same as me, that the people who stay—who truly find lasting growth—are often those who shift their focus outward. They start teaching. They mentor new students. They support their training partners. They recognize that their practice is no longer just about them.
Why Helping Others Helps You Heal
1. Connection Breaks Isolation – Depression often convinces us that we are alone. But when you help others, you see firsthand that struggle is universal. Everyone in the room is fighting a battle, and together, the weight is lighter.
2. Your Pain Becomes a Gift – The moments you struggled—the frustration, the setbacks, the days you wanted to quit—can become lessons that help someone else. And in teaching them, you reinforce your own growth.
3. A Reason to Show Up – When training is only about personal progress, it’s easy to skip when motivation is low. But when someone is depending on you—a student, a friend, a training partner—you find strength even on the hard days.
4. The Journey Never Gets Old – If you train only for yourself, you may reach a point where you ask, “What now?” But when you train to support and uplift others, there is always something new—a new student to guide, a new lesson to share, a new depth to explore.
Kung Fu as a Lifelong Path
The great masters never stopped training—not because they needed more trophies or techniques, but because they had people to teach, wisdom to pass down, and a purpose beyond themselves.
Depression and Anxiety thrives in isolation, in feeling like nothing matters. The antidote is connection, responsibility, and purpose.
So if you, just like me ever feel like the passion is fading, ask yourself:
• Who can I help?
• How can I make someone else’s journey easier?
• How can I be the kind of person others can count on?
When Kung Fu becomes more than just a personal practice—when it becomes a way to serve, to uplift, to contribute—it stops feeling like “just another thing.” It becomes a source of meaning, something that always gives back.
Final Thoughts
Healing isn’t always about what we gain—it’s about what we give. And when we train not just for ourselves, but for others, we find a reason to keep moving forward.
Because the warrior’s strength is not in fighting alone, but in fighting for something greater…. Together.
Rafael González